What type of mood are you in when you walk through the door?
Are you one of these: Grumpy? Stressed? Angry? Quiet?..... Happy?
You’ve worked back late and you're tired and stressed, you finally get home after being stuck in traffic.. You walk through the door, dump your briefcase/bag down, you don't acknowledge your kids, wife/husband/partner who are in the kitchen getting dinner ready, you walk past them, plonk your self on the couch - in front of the TV and start scrolling social media.... Yep, this was me unwinding from work.. if this is you too, then adopting some or all of these tips will bring you back !!
1. Physical activity
If you don’t have time in the morning, this is your chance to do some physical activity and de-stress, so walk, run, ride, or swim when you get home or on the way home, even walk your dog or take your kids for a ride/scooter around the block..simple hey, but we just don't do it...
2. Self Development
If you are not reading or listening to some type of self-development, you are going to be left way behind...In your relationship and your relationship with yourself..If you are one of those people who thinks they know it all or they don't have time, or think self-development is all about motivational quotes and seminars where people walk on hot coals.. you are misinformed.. If reading a book is too much to ask, a great place to start is to listen to podcasts on the drive or commute home (download the app form iTunes). I love listening to podcasts, my wife introduced me to them a year or so ago and they have literally changed my life. This is a great opportunity and time for self-development and learning. There is no better time than on the commute home to listen to a great podcast and hear an interview with some of the greatest minds and successful people around. Here are a few of my favourites: Lewis Howes, Anthony Robbins, Dave Asprey, Tim Ferris and Joe Rogan.
3. This should be #1 on everyones home-time list...SMILE
There is a moment I remember when a friend of mine told me when I was training to run a 10km run at the Gold Coast Marathon that I should smile when running, as it takes your mind off the pain. I’m not sure why, but I remembered what he told me years ago when I was about to walk through the door pretty stressed out from work, undoubtedly about to lead to an argument, but in that moment I took a big deep breath and exhaled, put a smile on my face, and walked through the door. I immediately hugged and kissed my wife, and it changed our lives forever. We spoke about my work and what was causing the stress, I opened up about work, and she understood and gave advice. From then on I looked forward to coming home and talking about my day, and my wife loved listening to it.
Not sure if you have heard of Brendan Burchard, but he is one of the worlds leading high performance coaches and a New York Times Best selling author - he has a cue he tells himself as he walks into a room to speak, which is “Bring the joy”..... These 3 words create his "intention" and resets his mindset, which is an awesome tool to use to set your intention (change your attitude) when you get home or even when you get to work etc... Just like I put that smile on my face and walked through the door....
I challenge you guys to try this and see what happens!
Once you are home, take a big, deep breath and slowly exhale, put a smile on your face, and walk through the door and kiss and hug your kids and partner. This is a routine hack that moved me from being grumpy to being happy to be home. As I mentioned, I used to come home so stressed after work that the stress and anger would rub off on my wife, and it would be so tense at home it wasn’t healthy for either of us—it was like walking on egg shells.
4. Check your phone in at the door.
Easier said than done? The emails can wait, and Facebook and Instagram will be there in the morning (or at least until after dinner)—this time is for you to engage with your family and loved ones. At least leave this until after dinner if you can’t wait. This is hard, I know: I used to get urgent phone calls when I was home or dealing with clients overseas, but the better you manage this, the better home time will be. Engage. Don’t sit on the couch and check Facebook and Instagram, engage with your family.
I used to always say to my wife “this is me winding down and de-stressing”, but your mind is working overtime looking at pictures and posts and comprehending them, it is not resting or de-stressing at all. Think about it, looking at pictures of friends on an awesome sunny holiday while you are working your butt o can subconsciously create jealousy and resentment. So spend some time with your family or housemates and talk more, ask them about their day. Opening up and talking about your day and what stresses you out can be soothing—it is amazing what you can also solve by doing this, listening to someone so far removed from what you’re dealing with can also give you perspective on the situation. Think of it as a free counselling session.
So have a box, bowl or area you put your phone (and on silent) when you get home and you can't pick it back up until after dinner!